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When you're the little guy, you have to stand out in order to be noticed. In the automotive industry of the early 1950s, hearty sales figures and the difference between black and red ink on the books were what separated the runners from the almost-ran. General Motors, Ford and Chrysler feasted on the American auto market, leaving independent brands to fight over table scrap sales figures. Although they are nearly forgotten today, Kaiser-Frazer's 1952 and 1953 Manhattans made up a good portion of the company's sales in those lean years, and their charming style, proven mechanicals and enthusiastic club support make them truly underrated, worthy collectibles.
Inspect a potential buy for rust in the trunk floor and along the lower trunk and fender seams; replacement metal must come from donor cars.
The Kaiser Manhattan owed its high-status name to its stable mate Frazer; from 1947 to 1951, the premium Frazer was the Manhattan, which was available at various times as a four-door sedan, hardtop or convertible. After Frazer cars were discontinued in 1951, the Manhattan nameplate was transferred onto the top Kaiser, which superseded the Deluxe designation. Because some unfinished 1951 cars remained on production lines, a number of them were fitted with new serial numbers, altered hood ornaments and optional continental spare tire kits and marketed as 1952 Kaiser "Virginians"-when these leftovers were sold, the "real" 1952 models arrived.
Kaiser cars had been restyled in 1951, and credit for their advanced design went to Howard "Dutch" Darrin and Duncan McRae. These cars, which rode on a 118.5-inch wheelbase and stretched 208 1/2 (Special) or 210 3/8 (Deluxe) inches long, traded their slightly dowdy anonymous look for distinctive new lines; the thick sides and small windows of the early cars were replaced by sculptured panels with a characteristic "Darrin dip" below the rear side windows and an unprecedented amount of glass in the sleek greenhouses. The steeply raked windshield and rear window also shared an unusual center dip, which added strength to the structure and increased glass area to 3,541 square inches; the reverse-angled rear quarter windows added dynamic tension to the design years before BMW made it their trademark. Front appearance became subtler with a thin chrome grille bar and less massive bumpers, and the hunchback trunk was made less severe with squared-off rear fenders. The 226.2-cu.in. straight-six engine was carried over with minimal changes.
When newly minted Kaiser Manhattans were introduced as face-lifted 1952 model year cars, they were built in three of the five body styles available in lesser Kaisers. The two- and four-door sedans and the two-door Club Coupe were popularly chosen, and while factory order sheets showed the availability of Manhattans in the two- and four-door hatchback Traveler Utility Sedan styles of the Deluxe line, it is believed that just a handful were built. All 1952 Kaisers were subtly refined, with V-shaped hood emblems, thicker front grille bars with integrated parking lamps, redesigned front and matching rear bumpers, one-piece windshields and larger wraparound taillamps. Inside, safety and fashion were married in great style: Padded dashboards, recessed dash controls and pop-out windshield panels combined with upgraded interior materials to make Kaisers into special cars that outpaced their competition.
Reproduction tinted windshields with their signature center dip offered through the Kaiser-Frazer Owners Club
Changes for Kaiser's 1953 model year included dropping the slow-selling Club Coupe from the lineup; styling and functional alterations included widened chrome headlamp rings, counterbalanced trunklid hinges, redesigned white-on-black instrumentation, a new hood ornament and a lowered rear seat cushion for greater headroom. The Manhattan, being the top trim level for 1952 and the mid-level version below the expressive and luxurious Dragon for 1953, incorporated a number of special features that were either optional or unavailable on Deluxes. A wide chrome band wrapped around the cars' lower bodies, small chrome tailfins rested atop the rear fenders, and the front fenders were decorated with script nameplates. Other standard features included deluxe instrument panels and special steering wheels, full carpeting, tinted glass, heater/defrosters and front and rear center armrests.
Myriad options were available throughout the Kaiser lineup, and the Manhattan could be fitted with everything from two-tone paint, an 8-tube radio and a Conditioned Air system to an oil bath cleaner, overdrive for the three-speed manual or General Motors' Dual-Range Hydra-Matic automatic transmission. "Full-Control" hydraulic power steering was a new option for 1953 Manhattans, but few were so equipped.
ENGINE
The Kaiser Manhattan's sole available engine in 1952 and 1953 was the "Supersonic Six," the long-running L-head straight-six cylinder that displaced 226.2 cubic inches via its 315/16 x 43/8-inch bore and stroke. This solid-lifter engine featured pressure lubrication for all bearings, including the four main bearings, and splash lubrication for its timing chain and valve tappets. With a 7.3:1 compression ratio, single exhaust and a two-barrel downdraft Carter WGD model 781S carburetor, it made 115hp at 3,650 rpm and 190-lbs.ft. of torque at 1,800 rpm in 1952. In 1953, the power figures were bumped to 118hp at 3,650 rpm and 200-lbs.ft. of torque at 1,800 rpm due to better breathing via a Carter WGD 999S carburetor and an improved manifold and exhaust design.
Although it's well known that this sturdy Continental Engineering-designed 226.2-cu.in. straight-six had originally appeared in pre-war Grahams and was used in Willys/Jeep applications through the 1960s, some may not realize that it was also proven in many industrial applications, including motivating Massey Ferguson and Harris tractors, forklifts and some Navy bilge pumps. Due to this wide usage, replacement parts and rebuild kits are in plentiful supply. "All of the engine parts, from piston rings to bearings and timing gears, are available today," says Michael Meditz of Kaiser-Willys Auto Supply in Aiken, South Carolina. Bill Tilden, retired historian for the Kaiser-Frazer Owners Club International, recalls, "The only problems that were noted about these engines were valves that burned due to inadequate cooling and connecting-rod bearing failure due to improperly maintained oil levels. A valve job isn't all that scary, and these problems rarely arise when cars aren't driven hard on a daily basis-it's generally as sweet and smooth-running as any other six." Jack Mueller, founder of the Kaiser-Frazer Library, adds, "Due to the layout of the fuel lines and today's gasoline formulas (which evaporate at a lower temperature than gasolines of the 1950s and '60s), vapor lock is something to watch for during the summer."
The long-lived 226.2-cu.in. straight-six was used in everthing from pre-war Grahams to tractors, so its durability is proven, and mechanical parts availability is very good.
TRANSMISSIONS
Can you imagine a contemporary GM car wearing Bambu vinyl on its dash? While seat cloth doesn`t last, Kaiser vinyl is extremely durable, and NOS stocks of upholstery material will aid any restoration.
A column-shifted three-speed manual Borg-Warner transmission was standard in Kaiser Manhattans, although, by itself, it was considered a special order; it used ratios of 2.605:1 in first, 1.630:1 in second, 1.00:1 in third and 3.536:1 in reverse. The factory-recommended optional Borg-Warner electric overdrive was identical to units used in Nash and Studebaker cars, and it had a 0.700:1 ratio to lower engine rpm at speed. Many owners chose to have the optional Dual-Range Hydra-Matic automatic, sourced from General Motors, installed. This four-speed fluid coupling transmission with planetary gears had 3.89:1 (first), 2.63:1 (second), 1.45:1 (third), 1.00:1 (fourth) and 4.30:1 reverse. The manual transmission, shared with other Kaisers, is a sturdy unit, and rebuild kits are available from a number of sources. Aside from their bellhousings, the Hydra-Matic transmissions are interchangeable with those in contemporary Buick-Olds-Pontiacs, and are also durable.
DIFFERENTIAL/REAR AXLE
The 1952 and 1953 Kaiser Manhattans used a Dana 44 hypoid differential and spiral bevel gears with semi-floating drive axles. The standard rear-axle ratio with the Hydra-Matic transmission was 3.31:1, the ratio with the three-speed/overdrive combination was 4.55:1, and the special-order three-speed manual used a 4.09:1. An alternate ratio for the three-speed/overdrive combination was a more relaxed 4.27:1. "Kaiser bought their rear axles from the same supplier as did Studebaker," Bill Tilden says, "and they were overbuilt for the power and performance of the car."
SUSPENSION
Kaiser suspensions of the early 1950s were noted for their well-rounded combination of handling and big-car comfort. The independently sprung front suspension used coil springs and tubular hydraulic shocks in conjunction with a linkless anti-roll bar, while the solid-axle rear end was suspended by semi-elliptic longitudinal leaf springs and canted tubular hydraulic shocks. The pressed steel wheels were fitted with 6.70 x 15 four-ply tires. An archived driveReport in SIA #94, written by Richard Langworth, described the 1953 Manhattan's handling as remarkably capable: "It tracks easily through high-speed curves, hangs on with modest body roll through tight corners, and is unaffected by crosswinds on the highway...ride is smooth on all surfaces." Repair issues like sagging coils or leaking hydraulic shocks are typical of many older cars, and replacement parts are available from a number of sources.
BRAKES
The Manhattan shared its four-wheel Bendix drum brakes with other Kaisers in 1952 and 1953. These hydraulic internally expanding drums measured 11 inches all around, and gave 176 square inches of lining area to offer good stopping power for the car's 3,265-pound weight. Jack notes that a Kaiser's master cylinder is the same one used in 1949-1951 Ford cars; drums, shoes and cylinders are all being reproduced, but steel brake lines will have to be fabricated if they are in poor condition.
BODY/FRAME
Unlike its fiberglass Kaiser-Darrin sibling, the Manhattan used a steel body mounted to U-section frame with a central X-member and four crossmembers. Due to Kaiser engineers' desire to combine the stiffness of a unit-body design with the lightness of traditional body-on-frame construction, they designed the sedan and coupe bodies to attach to the frame at an unusually large number of places. Although the bodies are admirably stiff and generally hearty, cars exposed to salt or extreme moisture do tend to rust along the bottom edge of the hood, along the lower rear fender seams, in the trunk floor and around the seams below the trunk opening, and in the rocker panels. Serious floor pan rot or heavy accident damage can relegate a Kaiser to parts car status, and 1951 through 1953 parts cars from dry areas are where replacement sheetmetal has to come from, as it is not being reproduced.
INTERIOR
Kaisers of the early 1950s were well known for the personalization that could be had via their amazing array of color and upholstery choices. In order to set their cars apart, the company stressed the use of new interior materials and fashionable color combinations. Manhattan interiors often combined fabric like "luxura" cloth and one of Kaiser's new heavy-duty vinyls; the patterned Boucle and Bambu vinyls that were used were made by "low- pressure refrigerated embossing" like the Dragon vinyl in those eponymous limited production models. While the cloth portions of Kaiser upholstery have tended to degrade over time, the vinyl has proven extremely durable. While the upholstery isn't commonly reproduced, stores of NOS material are still available from Kaiser specialists and through the KFOCI.
RESTORATION PARTS
The Kaiser-Frazer Owners Club is a Kaiser owner's best friend when it comes to restoring an old Manhattan back to showroom-new condition. "You can find a little bit of everything if you're willing to look," Michael says. "We have so many contacts through the club that if we don't have a part, we know who you can talk with to find it." Bill adds that, in addition to the stockpiles of NOS parts that major K-F parts suppliers and some restorers have, the club has an active remanufacturing fund; this non-profit fund sells the parts that have been remanufactured to club members for competitive prices. Items such as trunk handle gaskets, front rubber floor mats, sponge rubber horn pads, hood emblems, tinted windshields and a series of decals are all currently being made available. Getting a parts car will greatly ease the struggle for chrome and other trim items, and the fact that so many Kaiser components were outsourced means that Hydra-Matic transmissions, Autolite and Delco Remy electrics and Dana rear ends, among others, are easily found. "Although they made three-quarters of a million cars, it's almost impossible to find a Kaiser in a junkyard these days," Bill reflects. "They've been out of business for 50 years, so the club is your best bet-with nearly 2,000 members and regional chapters all over the country, someone is sure to have the parts you need." So if your automotive tastes run outside of the mainstream, consider a Kaiser for style and substance.
OWNER'S VIEW
"My brother Tom and I restored this car back in the early 1970s," says Bob Thornton, of our featured 1953 Manhattan, "and it's held up pretty nicely." The brothers found the car in 1968, and it had been abandoned. "It was our first restoration experience-it had a cracked block and some dents, but it was all there." After rebuilding the engine, smoothing the body, replacing the seats' cloth inserts and refreshing the paint and chrome, they drove it from their home in California to Detroit for the Kaiser International meet. "It got 23 mpg along the way," he adds with a smile. "I've picked up spare parts through the years, as body parts are drying up. I don't think I've ever had a situation where I haven't been able to get a part, though," he muses, then laughs, "I've got enough to build another one."
What drew Bob to this Manhattan? "I think they're extremely pretty cars. There was a Kaiser dealer down the street who had a new green 1952 model, and it was gorgeous. I always wanted to own one." He reports that his 100,000-mile, Hydra-Matic-equipped car drives very smoothly, and that it handles better than his 1953 Hudson Jet but isn't as stiffly sprung as his 1953 Studebaker coupe. "It doesn't have a lot of power, but it isn't overtaxed at 60-65 mph," Bob says. "It keeps up with traffic, but it's not a performance car." On the road, the Kaiser turns some heads. "Everybody looks at it, but nobody knows what it is-it's a real attention-getter," he chuckles.
SPECIALISTS
Kaiser-Frazer Owners Club Manufacturing Fund
716-593-4751
www.kfclub.com/Index1/manufacturing.html
Reproduction body, trim and interior parts
Kaiser-Willys Auto Supply
888-648-4923
www.kaiserwillys.com
Reproduction/NOS mechanical parts, engine overhauling
K-F-D Services
435-454-3098
www.kaiserbill.com
Reproduction, NOS and used body and mechanical parts
Rudy's KF Parts
2136 Walnut Street
Ramona, California 92065
760-789-3608
NOS, reproduction and used parts
Tarheel Kaiser-Frazer
336-784-5153
www.angelfire.com/nc2/TarheelKF/
NOS and used parts and literature
CLUB SCENE
Kaiser-Frazer Owners Club
P.O. Box 44
Ravenna, Michigan 49451
Dues: $30/year; Membership: 1,800
WHAT TO PAY
PARTS PRICES
Air cleaner decal $2
Brake master cylinder $125
Carburetor rebuild kit $45
Engine overhaul kit $775
Exhaust system $199
Front end rebuild kit $380
Hood emblem $43
Lower taillamp gasket $90
Rear carpet set $40
Steering wheel $160
Timing chain $60
Transmission rebuild kit (Hydra-Matic) $360
Water pump $80
Windshield $355
PRODUCTION FIGURES
1952
Two-door Sedan 1,315
Four-door Sedan 15,839
Club Coupe 263
Total 17,417
1953
Two-door Club Coupe 2,342
Four-door Sedan 18,603
Total 29,945
Recent
Patina is huge these days, and for good reason. While the weathered “survivor” look is not for everyone, it absolutely has its benefits. When you put down $10K or more to paint a car, you tend to not drive it as much because getting that first scratch is terrible. It is just easier to enjoy a car that already has some scrapes and dings, especially if it isn’t a particularly rare model. The interior, however is one of those places where patina is usually accompanied with a musty smell of Grandma’s cellar. An original interior that is faded but intact can be cool, but that often quickly gives way to just looking gross. Such was the case of our 1973 Volkswagen Beetle project. When we got it eight years ago, the interior was at a "decent survivor" level, but after sitting another eight years, the interior was beyond our level of salvageable.
Photo: Jefferson Bryant
<p>The door cards were not terribly warped, but the vinyl was peeling and dingy. We could have saved all but the passenger door card, which was water damaged from the window regulator failing. The carpets were threadbare and had long lost their desired to stay in place on the floor. Besides the condition, everything was black, and that just added to the sadness. Bugs are supposed to be happy little cars, not sad, so we placed a call to TMI Products to get some fresh threads for the Bug’s insides. Our custom order included front and rear seat covers, door panels, carpet, headliner, and visors. TMI allows you to order any material they offer, so we were able to order an interior that matches the planned paint scheme, which is a two-tone seafoam turquoise on cream white. This was carried throughout the upholstery, with a sweet houndstooth on the turquoise fabric, which is on the center centers and the door inserts. </p>
Photo: Jefferson Bryant
<p>The door panels are relatively easy to install. The treated fiberboard door cards fit most Beetle models, you just match up the holes you need and pop the perforated sections out. We reused the original metal clips that hold panels to the doors and interior quarter panels. The carpet is the real job here. Unlike most cars, Beetle carpets are not a press-molded one- or two-piece affair, instead they are a cut and sewn jig saw puzzle that is glued to the floor. This means that you need a few special tools, specifically a paint gun, some upholstery cement, and a roller.</p>
Photo: Jefferson Bryant
<p><strong></strong>Preparation for the carpet install is critical for a VW. If the floor is not spotless, the carpet will not stick in that area, eventually leading to it coming up. Vacuuming the entire floor and then wiping it down with brake cleaner, thinner, or some other solvent is a very good idea. Installation of this type of carpet can be a little daunting, but it is not that hard, you just need some patience and planning. Some of the sections don’t quite overlap, instead they butt together, so pre-installing each section can making notes is a good idea, even if you have done it before. </p>
Photo: Jefferson Bryant
<p>The glue used to secure the carpet is important to good installation. You may be tempted to use something like 3M General Adhesive from a spray can, but that is a mistake. While it will work for a while, this spray glue is not strong enough to hold heavy carpet to a floor, especially in summer heat. Instead, you need professional upholstery cement. We used WeldWood Landau Top and Trim contact adhesive, which can be found online in sizes as small as one gallon. You can also buy it from your local upholstery shop. Most shops will sell you some without having to buy a big pail. Our carpet took 2.5 gun cups to complete the carpet installation. That is about is about 80-ish ounces of glue. We used a typical siphon-feed spray gun for glue. Don’t ruin your gravity feed gun by putting glue in it. Pick up a cheap siphon feed from a bargain tool store. The glue is hard to clean, and you will only use that gun for glue from that point on.</p>
Photo: Jefferson Bryant
<p>The glue-up is a two-step process. We use a large piece of cardboard on the ground to keep dust away from the carpet and to keep the glue off the floor. The back side of the carpet is sprayed up the edge, and the floor is sprayed as well. Then you let the glue tack up for a couple of minutes before setting the carpet in place. You don’t want to spray all of the carpet and the whole floor at once; instead, do one section at a time. Where you need to spray onto the new carpet or any surface you want to protect, a piece of cardboard makes for an excellent edging tool. Once the two layers of glue touch, it is pretty much down. You can reposition it a little, but you may have to spray more glue down if everything peels up.</p>
Photo: Jefferson Bryant
<p>We worked from front to back, installing the kickpanels, then the firewall, front main floor, rear floor, then the sills. Take pictures of your carpet before you start, paying attention to each piece and how it lays over, under, or butts to the next section. After you lay down a section, use a rubber flooring roller to press the glue together, ensuring a proper installation.</p>
Photo: Jefferson Bryant
<p>There are few areas that need trimming, such as the sill heater vents and the seat sliders, which on Beetles is weirdly part of the floor and not the seat. We were missing a few pieces of plastic trim, which we will replace later when we replace the cracked dash and headliner. Going from a drab black to this bright and vibrant package transformed the interior of our Bug. It is no longer a place sadness, it is fresh, bright, and fun, just like a Beetle should be. </p>
Source
TMI Products • (888) 460-0640 • tmiproducts.com
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Photo: Provided By Author
I turned 18 in late 1977. Ordinarily it would have been just another birthday, especially considering I had my driver’s license less than a year, but it was significant in that I was hired as a valet parking attendant at The Manor, a well-known fine dining restaurant and caterer - that doubled as a very popular wedding venue - located in West Orange, New Jersey. It also meant I could leave behind yard work, dog care, and the sporadic odd jobs of scooping ice cream and delivering newspapers.
The Manor sat on an extensive mountainside property adjacent to a wooded reservation and a golf course, so it was a great place to work outside in the fresh air. Visitors entered the property through tall gates and navigated a tree-lined driveway that led to the grand entrance of the pillared Georgian mansion. Valet parking was free and not required. If visitors opted for valet service, vehicles were driven from the main entrance to either an upper or lower lot. The farthest parking spaces were more than a quarter mile away from The Manor’s front door.
I had been into cars since childhood, so this was a magical job. I was part of a crew of six or seven that worked for tips, and we wore orange coverall uniforms so that we were easily seen at night. We routinely parked and returned more than 400 cars on a busy Saturday, with parties in the afternoon and then again at night, together with public dining.
Jockeying cars for position in shrinking lanes during return rush times made me a better and more precise driver. Another benefit was that I developed a higher appreciation for well-designed dashboards, budding smart controls, and quality upholstery. I preferred gauges to warning lamps, and I intensely disliked the flashing green and yellow dashboard fuel economy indicators that seemed unwelcome in luxury cars. The only way to make the annoying indicator stay green was to coast.
As a crew, we elbowed each other to park the hot imports, such as BMW’s 2002, Datsun’s Z variants, the first Honda Accords, Toyota Celicas, and less frequently, Volkswagen Sciroccos. These were all well-equipped, light, quick, and easy to park. It was also possible to shift them into higher gears for test drives by taking the long way around to the lower back lot. As far as I knew, none of us ever got a Porsche 911 out of second. Our boss knew the joyride risk, so we had to keep numbered dashboard tickets in sequence for assigned spaces that discouraged long drives around the property.
Photo: Hemmings Archives
I have many fond memories of the job. To start, the things people left in their vehicles were nothing short of amazing. There were open bills with private information in plain view, and mail of every other conceivable variety, as well as checkbooks, laundry, arts, and crafts in all stages of non-completion, sticky food wrappers, and other trash. I also quickly learned that a tip amount didn’t always correspond to the expense or condition of the car after one guest left a caged guinea pig in his 1967 Pontiac Le Mans when he arrived late for a wedding reception. Aside from needing to be washed and vacuumed, that car was quite fragrant. It was a dry day, so I lowered the side windows, and we took turns checking the pet as we ran to and from other vehicles. Later, the guest told me he was glad the party was over and was eager to reunite the guinea pig with his young daughter. Having noticed us checking on the pet, the car owner gave me the biggest tip I ever got to fetch a car.
Another unusual thing happened while parking a 1975 Buick LeSabre sedan. Two people got out and went inside for dinner and as I got in immediately noticed the aroma of freshly baked bagels emanating from two gigantic bags that took most of the rear seat, nearly reaching the headliner. After parking the car, I was spooked by a low voice from the far-right of the back seat that asked, “Howee doin’?” I had not seen the slight fellow partially hidden by one of the tall bags, and all I could ask was if he intended to go inside. He said he didn’t want a fancy dinner, just a nap. He offered bagels to the entire crew, which were delicious, and stayed in the car and slept for two hours.
Rare cars would roll up on occasion, including one almost everyone guessed was a Maserati, though I recognized it as a Facel Vega. The exhaust growl of the Chrysler Hemi V-8 was positively rhapsodic, and the grand tourer had polished wood throughout its interior. We parked it in a special spot on an outer aisle near the front door and overheard customers speculate what it was while waiting for their own cars. When the tweedy owner eventually came out, my boss, Ray, was determined to sound smart and amuse himself. He conspicuously and formally signaled, “Christopher, the Facel Vega, please.” Seeing where we placed his pride and joy, the owner gleamed. He may have enjoyed that moment more than his dinner.
Another story involved a regular customer’s Cadillac Seville during lunch hour, when Ray often let me work alone so he could get a break. Two County Sheriff’s detectives stopped to tell me they were looking for two inmates who had escaped from the local penitentiary wearing–what else–orange coveralls. They were last seen running on the neighboring golf course. Of course, we always left keys in the ignition of parked cars. The detectives asked how many cars remained from lunch, and whether I could account for each. To my dismay, the Cadillac (one of only three cars left in my charge) was gone! The owner was very classy when the detectives needed his license plate number and unselfishly said he was glad I had not run into the thieves. Luckily for me, the car was recovered unscratched at a nearby shopping center, but we never heard if the thieves were caught.
I rarely drove a car onto the open road, but one exception was a permanent resident’s 1976 Rolls Royce Silver Shadow. The luminous dark red sedan was overdue for its annual state inspection and the owner’s wife “volunteered” me to drive it to the inspection station in the next town. The engine was so quiet and vibration-free that I had to concentrate to hear it. The interior was beautifully appointed with the finest leather I had ever seen or touched. Intuitive controls were set in burled walnut. In my opinion the steering wheel was somewhat primitive and too hard for an ultra-luxury auto, but it was a minor nitpick since the car was a magic carpet. It literally floated when put in drive. As expected, there were no buzzes, squeaks, or rattles. It handled well and predictably with adequate road feel, despite its considerable weight. Power came immediately at the slightest touch, suggesting ample reserve, and the Rolls-Royce stopped on a dime.
Photo: Hemmings Archives
Admittedly, I was very nervous driving it, even when it seemed other drivers stayed out of the way once I reached a multi-lane avenue. The inspection station was in a not-so-nice area on a narrow, bumpy street, and being near closing time the station was busy. I had to get in a line that snaked around the block and all I could do was hope nobody hit the darn thing.
As I crawled to the entrance, the inspection staff was laughing and pointing at me, still wearing my orange coveralls: “Hey kid, how did you get out of jail and where did you get that car?” Fortunately, my uniform sported a company crest. Seeking mercy, I said it was the boss’ car. Then the Rolls failed its emissions test. Adding to the insult, the dented, oxidized Volkswagen Beetle behind me passed with flying colors. In those days, a sticker with a big red circle signifying failure was affixed to the windshield’s lower left corner. You couldn’t miss it.
I finally relaxed when I pulled the Silver Shadow into the familiar driveway without incident. To my surprise, the owner’s wife was happy to see that the car failed, because now she could get it tuned up without further debate. Apparently, her husband was always working and neglected his cars. We were reminded of that later when we had to jump the battery in his seldom-driven Jaguar XJ12. The next time I saw the Rolls it had a proper inspection sticker.
After parking cars for eighteen months, I transferred inside to become a bartender as my college days progressed. I missed handling the cars, but not enduring cold winter nights or donning those orange coveralls. Over the years I have almost always insisted on parking my own car, but when valet parking is unavoidable, particularly in a city, I tip in advance. It’s remarkable how a few dollars will often gain a spot close to the attendant’s booth, sometimes with a safety cone next to our car.
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