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This article is part of In Session: The Teen Vogue Lesson Plan. Find the full lesson plan here.
As our mainstream culture’s understanding of LGBTQ+ identities continues to grow, there’s a greater knowledge surrounding the way that sexuality can exist in a spectrum. Despite widespread progress and education, there are still many misconceptions surrounding some sexual identities, such as pansexuality, which isn’t as widely understood as some of the other terms within the LGBTQ+ umbrella.
If you find yourself with questions about what it means to be pansexual, don’t worry — we’ve got you covered here. Ahead, we’ll break down what pansexuality means, and how it differs from bisexuality, with the help of some young people who identify as pan, as well as Carol Queen, author, activist, and founding director of the former Center for Sex and Culture.
What is pansexuality anyway?
In simple terms, pansexuality means being attracted to all people regardless of gender identity or sex. The prefix pan is the Greek word for all. Pansexuality is a noun, and pansexual can be used as a noun or an adjective to describe a person who is pansexual. The amount of people identifying as pansexual has been steadily growing over the years; according to a 2017 survey from the Human Rights Campaign (HRC), the number of youth who identify as pansexual had nearly doubled since previously calculated in 2012.
How is pansexuality different from bisexuality?
Some people who identify as pan might also refer to themselves as bisexual, but the identities carry subtle differences as well. Pansexuality is part of the bisexual umbrella, meaning it's one of many identities in which someone is attracted to more than one gender. According to GLAAD, identifying as bisexual means you're attracted to two or more genders, while identifying as pansexual means you're attracted to people of all genders, and both identities are inclusive of the trans community. So the two overlap quite a bit, and for some folks, they signify similar things. But what it means to be bisexual or pansexual is also largely up to the person who identifies that way. As with any sexuality, whatever word feels best is best.
How do young people define pansexuality?
Defining pansexuality requires more than a dictionary, because sexual expression and interpretation are highly personal. "There is no exact definition for pansexuality, and people who identify as pansexual might want to be ready to clarify their own specific ‘take’ on this identity to people who are confused about its implications," says Queen. "Just stating your sexual orientation does not automatically tell others what you’re down to do."
Of course, you are never obligated to explain your sexuality, and it’s important to note that sexual identity is not inherently about sex. Whatever label a person uses (or if they eschew labels entirely) means way more than just who they might be hooking up with.
Taking Queen's advice to heart, we asked three young people who identify as pansexual to share what being pansexual means to them.
Alexa: "If I dig your energy, I dig you."
“I've found that being pansexual is extremely empowering as a woman. I don't feel defined by the ridiculous gender roles of our society," says Alexa, a 25-year-old who discovered her pansexual identity post-college, when she first fell in love with another woman. "I wouldn't go so far [as] to say I'm gender-blind, but I work off energy. If I dig your energy, I dig you.”
Danielle: "I never want to alienate anyone in my sexual expression."
Danielle, a 28-year-old who came from a conservative Caribbean culture, discovered her pansexuality after first thinking she was bisexual. She took a course in queer studies, and assessed her sexuality. “To me, pansexuality feels the most organic way to exist in this world," she explains. "It’s all about energy and who you’re attracted to, and to shut yourself off because you are predisposed to thinking you’re not attracted to men or whatever, can prematurely shut you down from a connection that you might be able to have. I tend to be attracted to people who hold a little masculine and a little feminine energy.”
HB: "My sexual attraction is not based on gender assignment or gender expression."
"I knew since I was a kid that I liked both women and men. Joan Jett made me feel funny in the same way as Bruce Springsteen," says HB, a full-time student who identifies as pansexual. "I had identified as bisexual for most of my life, but as an adult, I heard the term pansexual and I realized it was a more accurate description of the way I felt. I'd say the best definition would be that my sexual attraction is not based on gender assignment or gender expression. I am attracted to men and women as well as nonbinary people who don't identify as either. I am attracted to certain personality types and physical features, just like anyone else.”
What are some misconceptions about pansexuality?
Personal definitions on pansexuality differ, but the overarching theme is that gender does not limit attraction. This often leads to the misconception that pan people are hypersexual. Just like not all straight women want to hook up with every straight guy they see, not all pan people are attracted to every person they see.
It’s a ridiculous assumption, but Alexa says some people still have trouble taking her sexuality seriously. “It certainly makes the dating pool more like a dating lake,” she says. “But I have found that many hetero men and homosexual women have trouble seeing a long-term future with me and think I'm just ‘in a phase.’”
HB agrees, saying the biggest misconception about pansexuality is “that we are trying to have sex with anyone and everyone. [Again], I am attracted to certain personality types and physical features, just like anyone else.”
“It’s not like I have this crazy sex drive and I need more people to satisfy it, and that’s why I’m pansexual,” says Danielle. “It’s that I’m open to everyone and their amazing energy; but whether it meets up with mine is a totally different thing. It’s a hard thing for people to wrap their heads around when they are already carrying their own weird insecurities and biases about how people should identify.”
This is a common problem, according to clinical sexologist and marriage and family therapist Kat Van Kirk, who works with teen clients and the LGBTQ+ community. "Pansexual teens sometimes struggle to find a community to identify with and get support from,” she says. “Even within some LGBTQ+ organizations, there is a misunderstanding of what pansexuality is. Therefore, these teens may experience exclusion and isolation. They're also at a higher risk for being harassed regarding their orientation. They may find it difficult to date when potential partners don't understand or are intimidated by who they are attracted to."
There are also some misconceptions that lead people to (falsely) believe that pansexuality is more inclusive than bisexuality, but it’s important to remember that both identities are inclusive of all genders, including people who identify as trans or non-binary.
Where to go for more resources?
There’s a plethora of LGBTQ+ friendly resources available online, like The Trevor Project’s guides on coming out, coping with mental health, and being a supportive ally to friends and family members. The Bisexual Resource Center also has a ton of helpful materials surrounding pansexuality, including a directory of community-based groups where you can find others who identify similarly.
If you’re contemplating coming out as pansexual, remember that there’s no “right” way or time to do so, and at the end of the day, coming out is a personal decision that should be done on your own terms. Most importantly, you aren’t alone, and there are plenty of resources and information out there to help you feel seen.
This article was first published in 2015 and has since been updated to include the most accurate and relevant information.
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